ReadWritePoem prompt # 87
Wind is a Poet Tonight
rising over the house percussion,
swashing rain against the window,
a snare drum above the bed,
whooshing down spouts,
and in the darkness of that din,
we snuggle tighter, loving
the perfect safety of each other …
No, wait.
Those last two lines
darted in on poetry’s gauzy wings
seeking shelter, but
there’s no truth in them.
... and in the darkness of that din
I raise my voice and
sing an off-key duet with the wind
and its erratic band:
sssssssssshhhhhh under the eaves,
aaaaaaaahhhhh in door cracks,
oooooooooooooooooooo
Wanda McCollar
I like the third stanza!
ReplyDeleteyour yellow shirt contrasts with the pillar
Like all the musical references and the appearance of the wistful wanda fairy in the second stanza..seems she's an idee fixe
ReplyDeletein your work.whoooosh I'm off to bed it's late here.Lovely sweet poem
Wanda.
Oh, and I liked those two lines that "darted in on poetry’s gauzy wings", Wanda!
ReplyDeleteI like this -- how at first we think we're being taken into a romantic interlude and then you take us elsewhere for a twist. I would like to actually hear it read out loud.
ReplyDeleteGood write.
-Nicole
I love the way you interrupt the poem to bring the reader a different reality. I agree that it would be fun to hear it read aloud.
ReplyDeleteI love the turn in the second stanza -- it's a great surprise!
ReplyDeleteThe visual and audible picture you've painted f wind and rain is quite captivating... well written.
ReplyDelete... we snuggle tighter, loving
the perfect safety of each other …
...my favorite thing on a rainy night, of which there are many here in Oregon.
Thank you all for your comments.
ReplyDeleteI'm late in responding (cranking up for school starting). I appreciate your remarks - the poem is one of the few that sort of wrote itself. I didn't intend it to go off in that direction, but was pleased when it did!
(Honesty is always best in poetry and life!)